Entertainment from Bali

I think it’s time to shut my philosophical mode off for now and start entertaining my readers, don’t you agree? Let’s talk business…travel business that is, with a tiny little dash of humor. I already have a pretty extensive travel blog in Dutch, which I still read once in a while. It’s so nice to read those stories again; it always puts a smile on my pretty face and gets me through the day. Day dreaming about far away and sunny destinations. And I must say, I think I can be sort of funny at times. So I decided to share some of those hilarious “did-you-know-thats” from my trip to Bali with you.

Did you know that…: 
 

• I realized today this trip starts looking like my own Eat, Pray and Love experience;
• my “eat”-stage started in Sanur;
• the proof of this is the button of my pants bursting open;
• Bali is significantly more expensive than Thailand;
• therefore, I want to thank the CBI, The Ministry of Foreign Affairs and thus all of you tax paying guys for making this trip possible for me;
• the medicine man from Eat, Pray and Love is the fourth child in his family;
• I know this because his name is Ketut and not Wayan (first born), Made (second born) or Nyoman (third born);
• this is probably totally useless information for you guys;
• statues on Bali all wear a skirt;
• these skirts are black and white checkered;
• this is not necessarily fashionable in Bali, but it seems to represents good and evil;
• I’m being stared at by this little concrete guy in a skirt all night long;
• this does not impress me at all, though (hello!? Men in skirts make NO impression);
• in the streets of Bali it smells like who smoke (incense) everywhere (note from author: uhm...I guess this is actually only funny for the Dutch speaking readers. Wie-rook: who smoke);
• this is because Balinese people put little baskets with flowers and incense sticks in the streets;
• out of respect, I do my utter best not to step on those baskets;
• nevertheless they’re all pretty crushed, because most tourists step on them without any shame;
• Balinese people actually do the same;
• the usefulness of my frantic attempts is therefore totally lacking;
• three waiters have told me tonight “you look soooo happy”;
• I find it a bit odd they all added an extremely surprised “why???”;
• I tried some chakra meditation at the yoga barn in Ubud. From now on I call the thing yoga darn, because it was darn difficult to find;
• afterwards somebody approached me in the streets asking “you do yoga?” I said “yes, but how do you know?”;
• he drily responded with “you have yoga face”; 

0900-call-a-horse...also for beer delivery!

• I haven’t been wearing my watch for three weeks;
• as a result a day actually only has four times: time for breakfast, time for lunch, time for dinner, and time for a beer (not necessarily in that order);
• there are no cars on the Gili’s;
• the only means of transport is 0900-call-a-horse;
• I asked the driver if accidents ever occur with this primitive type of transport;
• he simply responded with “yes, for sure” and I actually had to explain to him that it was not a reassuring answer;
• “java update available” on my portable computer thing’s got a very different meaning since my trip to Indonesia;
• that’s all for now folks;
• I’ll end this update with the overly poetic “no hurry, no chicken curry”.